CW: I know this time of year can be very difficult for some, so I’ve left some support links at the bottom of the page if anyone needs them.
Christmas again…
It’s Christmas time! It rolls around every year, and I always feel wildly unprepared! Growing up, I loved Christmas, but I always struggled with the lack of routine, and the pressure of being present (ha!) for a whole day. As an adult, I’m a lot more neutral about Christmas. I still struggle in the same ways as a kid – only now I focus on resting and recovering as much as possible! Let’s dive straight into it:
Why is the festive season so difficult for autistic/ADHD people?
Christmas can be a really difficult time as it is, for many different reasons. But, I know from my own experiences, it can be especially difficult for those of us with autism, ADHD or both – here are some of the common difficulties:
- Lack of routine – This can be anything from the different food we eat this time of year, having Christmas decorations up, being off school/work, doing different activities than normal, and even wearing Christmas jumpers!
- Expectations – There are big expectations this time of year – from being expected to socialise a lot, needing to be in a ‘festive’ mood, and generally feeling happy, or needing to be ‘surprised’ when you receive a gift.
- Socialising (or lack of socialising) – This is a big thing! The expectation that everyone should be so incredibly social this time of year is always a struggle for me. Whether it be with family, friends, or acquaintances – it never fails to fill me with overwhelm and anxiety. Alternatively, there are many people who aren’t social this time of year, which can lead to loneliness (I definitely feel this fairly regularly!)
- Sensory problems – Colder temperatures (and the layers of clothing that come with it), twinkling Christmas lights and incredibly busy shops can make a sensory nightmare. Personally. I love seeing the Christmas lights going up, but even that can overwhelm me if I’m not careful.
- Exhaustion – Now, this one might be more of my own feelings towards the festive season, but I find that as I start winding down, as a result of the above points, as well as generally life being tiring – especially this time of year. As the title suggests – hibernation very much happens for the last bit of the year! And I’m not speaking in a metaphorical sense either!
So, what can I do to help the Autistic/ADHD people in my life?
A little disclaimer as we go into this section – the best thing you can do to support is to just ask the person! We all have different needs, which may very well be different from the ones I’ve spoken about here.
- Try to give them a plan of what to expect during the day – for example, I always make sure to ask my family/friends for a breakdown of what is going to be happening on Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and Boxing Day, and even New Year’s Eve!
- Try to not have any expectations – for example, if your Christmas involves spending the day with extended family – expecting an autistic/ADHD person to mask for a whole day is just asking for trouble, and is probably going to result in a meltdown. Allowing the person to take time away, and set boundaries on what they want/don’t want to do, will make the day a lot more comfortable.
- It’s their break too! Give them plenty of time and space for rest and recovery. For example – Taking a break away from socialising, going for a walk, being able to stim however way is needed, or even just taking a nap! (taking myself away to a quiet room and snoozing in front of the TV with a Christmas film on is always a favourite for me!)
Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
And so, we have finally reached the end of the year – and this final blog post of the year. I hope that you have enjoyed the blogs so far – I’ve certainly enjoyed writing them! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to hibernate January! (and fill up on Christmas food!) I hope you all have a joyful (or quiet!) Christmas (or any holiday you celebrate!), and a calm and settled New Year.
L.
Product of the month:
It’s the Winter – the days are getting shorter – and certainly in the UK it gets dark at 4pm in the depth of Winter! SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) is fairly common – the NHS estimates SAD affects 1 in 20 people – that’s around 2 million people in the UK.
We could all do with getting more Vitamin D – and Lumie makes that so easy with their range of SAD lamps. I use the lamp while I work, and usually just keep it on for a few hours- it’s so easy to use and have definitely noticed a difference in my energy levels, as well as an increase in my mood!
Wobbly Wolverine 
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